Thank God I am replaceable
At work. For my cat. As a volunteer. I am replaceable in almost everything I do. There will always be someone better at what I do. Better at organizing, better at giving attention, better at cleaning my house, watering my plants.
And I am happy about it. Otherwise, I would never have time for personal development. Time to improve myself on levels where I can be a replacement for others. If I weren’t, I would feel responsible for everything, I would never dare to leave anything behind, I would always work late, or maybe do nothing at all. Besides, I would never find a job, because everyone would be just as irreplaceable as me.
We don’t like to think of ourselves as replaceable, that our qualities won’t be missed, that the hole we leave behind can easily be filled.
We enjoy the feeling of being unique, extraordinary.
The mishmash that is our personality and our qualities should fit like a glove in a certain position. However, there are other hands that can wear those gloves.
We want to be irreplaceable because we are afraid to be forgotten, or not mean as much as we thought we did. We stick to a position because we think nobody else can do our job like we do it. If we leave, it takes time to find a new place and become comfortable, it makes us vulnerable and we don’t like that either. But if we do find somewhere we can replace someone, no matter the reason for their departure, we feel valued. We mean something.
Relationships end, resulting in new relationships: replaceable. Unless your ex-girlfriend will tell your new girlfriend the exact shape of your relationship, the jokes, the roles, our partners are not as replaceable as it seems. Your new girlfriend will just be a copy of your old one, and you might as well have kept her. New partners can fill gaps, not replace others.
We might not be so replaceable after all.
Nothing can be done exactly the same when someone else does it. Except when the tasks are quite clear: watering plants, delivering packages, cleaning a house. However, we are more than just the tasks we do, we bring a past, a particular set-up of qualities that no one else has. Perhaps you are a plant whisperer and manage to let flowers bloom like no one else can. Your sister cannot have another brother. We cannot find new owners for our pets without them noticing.
Yet there will always be another plant whisperer with a different approach to whispering, making the flower bloom nonetheless.
And I am glad. I am glad we are replaceable. I wouldn’t want to do everything on my own.